September 14, 2013

Movie Night: Wild Wild West.

Review #454: Wild Wild West.

Will Smith (James T. West), Kevin Kline (Artemus Gordon and Ulysses S. Grant), Kenneth Branagh (Dr. Arliss Loveless), Salma Hayek (Rita Escobar), M. Emmet Walsh (Coleman), Bai Ling (Miss East), Ted Levine (General "Bloodbath" McGrath), Frederique van der Wal (Amazonia), Musetta Vander (Munitia), Sofia Eng (Miss Lippenrieder), and Garcelle Beauvais-Nilon (Belle) Directed by Barry Sonnenfeld (#005 - Get Shorty, #077 - The Addams Family, #078 - Addams Family Values, #211 - Men in Black, and #212 - Men in Black II)

This was adapted off the classic television show The Wild Wild West, though judging by how they apparently changed significant aspects of the film, I'd cross out the word adapted. Will Smith is usually charming, even in the cliched Independence Day, but not even he can give any life to the way his character is portrayed. Kevin Kline is okay at best, but to say this would be a step down from A Fish Called Wanda is an understatement. Kenneth Branagh...playing an southern scientist with no legs was odd enough...but the thing that takes the cake is...the spider. Yes, a Mechanical Spider, in the Wild West. You might wonder how it could feasibly be made, I'm just wondering how no one ever mentions seeing it after the film's end, though I suppose Grant wouldn't want "I saw a giant spider, while opening a railroad. No I am not insane." being the last line of his memoirs. The effects have more merit then the story and it's a bland  stand still of a film, disappointing western buffs, action buffs, and of course, Wild Wild West fans.

The film was terrible enough to inspire Robert Conrad (the star of the original show) to accept the film's five Golden Raspberry Awards in person, and I can't blame him for doing that. In conclusion, the best way to sum this film is one quote: "I made a mistake on Wild Wild West. That could have been better. ... No, it's funny because I could never understand why Robert Conrad was so upset with Wild Wild West. And now I get it. It's like, 'That's my baby! I put my blood, sweat and tears into that!' So I'm going to apologize to Mr. Conrad for that because I didn't realize. I was young and immature. So much pain and joy went into The Fresh Prince that my greatest desire would be that it's left alone." And when that comes from Will Smith himself, that just makes this sad film even worse. Avoid this film like it's the plague.

Overall, I give it 2 out of 10 stars.

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